Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Sankwitch Review

Location: 6th & Green, Champaign, IL
Sandwich Name: Orchard Chicken Salad
Bread: Monterrey Cheddar
Size: Footlong (what else?)
Cheese: Shredded
Additional Toppings: Lettuce, Pickles, Onions, Black Olives
Extra: not toasted, carry-out, no chips or drink
Background Entertainment: Lottery Ticket (2010 starring Bow Wow)

            Honestly, things were a bit rocky to begin with as the 1st Subway I went to ran out of my selected sandwich. Because of this, I almost completely bailed on the whole journey. How do they run out of their brand new sandwich and its only 4 days in? Anywho, I ventured over to 6th and Green to get my lunch and continue on home. The order went pretty smooth; there was only 1 other person in the line so I zoomed in and out. Now, obviously I didn’t dine-in, consensus is that this location employs convicts. So, I grabbed my sandwich and made the long walk back to The Chill.
            Back at the apartment, I threw on an HBO movie to provide some background entertainment as I dug into this new sandwich. Only thing I learned from the movie is that T-Pain is kind of funny. As I bit into the sandwich, I was met with interesting blend of chicken, grapes, and sauce. Now I’m not sure what type of sauce they use, but it definitely works for me. My advice is go with the sandwich cold as it’s meant to be a light sandwich you can enjoy during the summer. I paired it with an ice cold Country Time Lemonade (7 ice cubes) in a Kam’s glass, because that’s all we have around here because we drink a shit ton. I went in for the next bites of this sandwich and quickly realized a first for a Subway sandwich: there were no bad bites. I found myself looking forward to each next bite the same way Tony looks forward to bid day at the AXO house.
            Nearing the half-way point, I started to get sad as I realized my sandwich experience would be soon coming to an end. These bites were just as good as the first, which is a rarity in a $5 Footlong. A few bad raisins did spoil the finale, but that’s to be expected, especially from a raisin-ist. All in all, the sandwich was delightful, and I will certainly be buying another one in the near future. Cheers, peeps.  

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

2011 WNBA Draft Top 10 Recap...Because I Have Time on My Hands

1. Minnesota LynxMaya Moore (Connecticut): Biggest no-brainer since the Cavaliers selection of LeBron James in the 2003 NBA Draft and Parkland College’s acceptance of Tom Walsh in the 2008 Fall Expansion Draft. Besides the fact that she could start for the men’s team in Minnesota, she really does bring a lot to the table (wait for it…), including sandwiches and ice cold beers. But in all seriousness, she’s a franchise changer and they’re lucky to have her.


2. Tulsa ShockElizabeth Cambage (Australia): At 6’8” she has a chance to rack up more rebounds than DJ Dilo (usually Alpha Chis), which is really saying something. I’m intrigued to see if she’ll ever get the chance to play with the boys in Tulsa but we might not be ready for inter-divisional mingling just yet. And yes, I’m only two picks in and the lack of excitement has caused me to peruse the NBDL website. Not a good sign.


3. Chicago SkyCourtney Vandersloot (Gonzaga): Can’t tell you how excited I am that my hometown team selected Vandersloot, mostly because I’m intrigued as to how they’ll fit that last name on the back of one jersey. Imagine if she gets married and hyphenates her last name, then we’ll be in for a real treat! Although, the main issue with getting married is what that usually leads to (yes, little kiddies). I’ll be devastated if she gets sent to the DL for nine months with a severe case of pregnancy. Mark my words, if she pulls all this off, I will be buying her jersey and wearing to the beach all summer, because I'm bro.


4. Minnesota Lynx Amber Harris (Xavier): What? The Lynx get two top four picks? Who is running this lottery? Anywho, some called her “the best player in the country not named Maya Moore” which you have to take as a compliment. Hopefully, she doesn't play behind Maya’s shadow. I’d love to see her attack baseline and just throw it down on someone, er, lay it in off the glass and make a highlight reel. (Sidenote: any chance the Lynx can compete with the Timberwolves for Most Tattoos in town? Can anyone?)


5. Los Angeles Sparks Jantel Lavender (Ohio State): Going to be great to see her playing alongside Lisa Leslie who has been their franchise since the league was incepted in 1996. Wait, she doesn’t play anymore?-that changes everything I once loved (liked?) about the WNBA.  Well, as long as Candace Parker keeps up with her sick dunks, this could be nice high-low combo. If this draft pick doesn't bring the Sparks back to glory, I don’t know what will. I guess bringing in ex-L.A. Laker Adam Morrison and his NBA Finals Ring as a team psychiatrist would be pretty glorious, he's good at feelings. This video actually doesn't have nearly enough hits. Thanks, Gus.


6. San Antonio Silver Stars Danielle Robinson (Oklahoma): Why aren’t they just the Lady Spurs? Or the Spurettes or something? This draft recap has got me wondering why all the WNBA team names are just like their NBA counterparts? Seems to be a bit like the Coke/Coke-Zero taste stealing issue. Either way, whenever you can get ex-Spur David Robinson’s daughter in the 6th pick of anything, you have to do it.


7. Tulsa ShockKayla Pederson (Stanford): Again, how does one team have two top picks like this? Were the Shock really that bad?? I guess the answer is yes, after they finished a paltry 6-28 last season, which resembles a Tom Walsh ratio of bad jokes to worse jokes. That being said, this is truly a great value pick at this stage in the draft giving them more front-court depth to go alongside Cambage. Despite playing in the beautiful BOK Center, I just don’t see myself rushing to a Shock game in the near future.


8. Atlanta Dream Ta’Shia Phillips (Xavier) [traded to Washington]: In our first blockbuster deal of the day, we see Atlanta’s Kelly Miller and recent draft pick Phillips get sent to Washington with All-Star Lindsey Harding being sent to Atlanta. I just don’t see how the Dream can get back to the Finals after making a trade like this. Although this is strictly a business decision…kind of. (If a business isn’t making money, is it still a business? And in that case, can a non-business make a business decision? Or was the trade a non-business decision? I need a break from this.)


9. Indiana Fever Jeanette Pohlen (Stanford): For some reason, this feels like an excellent time to share my story of what occurred last weekend, after bar close, at a local late-night food establishment. Landy, DJdlo, and myself hit up Niro’s around 2:23 AM CST trying to get a quick drunk snack. Little did we know, a battle of epic proportions awaited us. A fellow student, wearing a v-neck t-shirt, claimed to have the ‘best chest-hair in the place.’ This little quip caught our ears, and we knew action must be taken. Landy immediately entered our confidante DJdlo into the battle. As competitor 1 lifted his shirt, the crowd of roughly 11 (give or take zero) let out a few claps and a couple of groans. As the clock struck 2:48 AM CST, with the crowd now near 2,000, DJdlo unveiled his pride and glory: the infamous ‘Black Carpet de Sensuality.’ The fans roared, and Competitor 1 walked out of the restaurant in shame, head hanging down to the floor. 17 girls all followed us home to The Chill, where we proceeded to build forts into the wee hours of the morning, because that’s what college guys do when members of the opposite sex come over late at night, right? It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.


10. New York Liberty Alex Montgomery (Georgia Tech): Big time value pick here for my new selection of “America’s Team.” I mean come on; they’re based out of one of our first major cities, located in a top-3 media market, and a team name that defines what our nation stands for. Any time you can take a “bona fide double-double machine” who averaged 13.6ppg and 8.6 rpg, you have to go just go for it. Anyone else confused as to why those stats make a double-double machine? Because I am. Explain please.


...and that will conclude my 2011 WNBA Top 10 Draft Picks Retro Recap and I thank you for your time. I'll be honest, as the selections ventured on past the 'Top 1 Picks,' it became hard to come up with material, but oh well. I hope you enjoyed, and maybe even chuckled a little bit. I'll send you out with one last video, mainly because I just learned how to embed videos and figured that made me cooler than you.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Monday, April 11, 2011

...Last But Not Least

LaMike – “DJ Consensual Sex”

Hometown: Pontiac “Peace Up, P-Town Down,” Illinois

Height: 5’8” on a good day

Weight: 150 lbs

Strengths: golfing, bowling (both real and Wii), zamboning

Weakness: day drinking. Seriously, he can’t day drink to save his life

LaMike met cliff103-5 in the famed Weston dorms back in the Fall of ’07 and it’s been history ever since. He’s your classic farm boy: born and raised in central Illinois, he quickly took to working at an ice arena once he reached the college level (I know, where did that come from?). This humble employee was a championship skate sharpener before he took his talents to South Armory Street for the bright lights of zambonis. Now he can be found 3 times a week ‘boning’ at the UI Ice Arena where he has established himself as one of the most feared Zamboni drivers in the B1G. LaMike is an avid music fan and also thinks very highly of the videos he finds on YouTube that just aren’t funny (see: Gregg, Old). We’re also pretty sure he’s a part owner of DeadSpin because he cites it in nearly everything he does. If you happen to run into this young man, don’t mention his receding hairline but feel free to talk about Super Mario with him for hours on end. And if he offers you any Kimmy's delicious baked goods, be sure to eat them - they're incredible.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Introductions

Being the hick of the apartment, I am all for southern hospitality. So it’d be rude of me to not introduce my roommates and give you a little snapshot of their lives.

Landy

Hometown: Some shitty south suburb, IL

Height: 6’ 5”

Weight: pre-burrito king: 210 lbs / post-burrito king: 235 lbs

Strengths: Knowing everyone and their uncle on campus, passing out mid-conversation, Jack Daniels, snoring

Weaknesses: Jack Daniels, Brock, gas prices

Landy is the classic good guy on campus. He’s also the classic alcoholic. He’s also proud of his 330,000-view youtube video from high school, but not so proud of his considerably less-viewed video on facebook. His living quarters are the dungeon, also referred to as the basement, and more often than not, the wonderful stale beer-smell will hit fill your nostrils as you’re walking down the stairs. He claims to be good at beer pong, but his skills are relatively unproven against people other than Brock and Brock’s brother, who is also named Brock (we think). He dislikes Jerry Reinsdorf almost as much as he dislikes the French. His family enjoys large vehicles, and we believe they have yet to hear of the concept of “going green”. He also bartends on a boat sometimes in a little city whose name rhymes with Shmishmago, so ladies, get to know this handsome gentleman.

DJ Pauly D-LO

Hometown: Mexico

Height: 6’ 1”

Weight: 2007: 170 2008: 250 2011: 180 (he’s a wildcard)

Strengths: Freshmen, 21, scissoring with men, convincing randoms to kiss each other, chest hair

Weaknesses: he drives a Kia, gambling, pop music

Pauly D-LO is the suave one of the group. His methods of wooing women involve setting a hat on the ground and dancing around it in circles repeatedly. Somehow, it works, with women of all ages (I know what you’re thinking, but don’t worry, he ID’s. 18 means 18, ladies.), shapes, and sizes. However, as good as he is playing the lead role, he’s an absolutely awful wingman. He made out with CrazyMel once. That was awesome. He also apparently has a job on campus, but the rest of us are convinced he just drives around in his super cool Kia for a couple hours, then comes back explaining how “his project lead really enjoys the direction he’s taking” (bullshit). He was also once featured in a Bill Simmons mailbag, but chances are he’s already told you that story six hundred times. He’s a muy bueno guy.

Cliff103.5

Hometown: Not Chicago even though he often says Chicago, IL

Height: 5’ 8”

Weight: 150 lbs

Strengths: super fly dance moves, super fly beats, super fly kicks, ebonics

Weaknesses: an unhealthy obsession with uniforms

Cliff103.5 the type of people make the club get crunk. He is one of the greatest individuals you will ever meet on this campus, nay, on this Earth. He may be white on the outside, but is definitely the darkest of the 103.5 crew (which, in reality, isn’t really saying much). His passions include beats, shoes, and uniforms, not necessarily in that order. He also rents cars for a living. He will also spend hours repeatedly watching the same 5-second clip of a Chris Brown music video in order to get the dance move down. That’s dedication. While Pauly D-LO made a Simmons mailbag, Cliff103.5 made a slightly lesser known mailbag some guy writes about uniforms, which is pretty cool too (I guess). One of his favorite activities involves getting hammered at a bar, jogging home, then puking because he made the awful decision of jogging home. He is also this college’s head marketer for Sun Drop soda, and has the free 12-pack and letter from the company to prove it. He’s a true A+ individual.

So there you have it. Stay classy.

XOXO,

La103.5Mike

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Unofficial Weekend 2011 Official Plus/Minus

To start things off, here's the official link to the new blog is http://1035thechill.blogspot.com/, also can be found above. The posters here are the members of the prestigious ‘103.5 The Chill’ apartment located near 1st and Daniel in Champaign, IL. They are known as Cliff103.5, DJ Pauly D-LO, La103.5Mike, and myfriendlandstrom. For our initial post, you’ll see our official plus/minus chart from Unofficial Weekend 2011, which took place in early March. Now in the past, it has become customary for us to compile these lists after the completion of a big drinking weekend (read: we drink a lot and are cooler because of it) to review and recap the tomfoolery we partook in. Similar to sporting events, plusses were given for funny/heroic/memorable/manly acts while negatives were given for unfortunate/dumb/bitchy acts, or just for things we thought weren’t classic. So, hopefully this introduction gives you a little insight into where this blog is going, and where this first post is headed. And yea, this post is more about us having more fun than you, sorry. If we've learned one thing in college, it's that fun is a Zero-Sum Game. And we have all of it.

Dilo: +2 for the 21 Game Winner of the year, -2 for Green lighting Marsh to get with that girl, +2 for Buying 12 slices of pizza unofficial night @ 2 AM, +1 for Puzzle piece find, -1 for Banning us from Champaign, -1 for Tidal Waving a Girl [Overall +1]

Marsh: +1 for Being a Tazing Champion, -8 for Worst Girl Ever Situation, +1 for Bulls throwback gear, +1 for exclaiming “I Have NOOO NIPPLESSS” multiple times [Overall -5]

Real: +2 for Bushdiving Caught on Video (bushdive, disappear, reappear), +1 for Tidal Waving Tony DiLiberto at the Bar, +1 for Day Drinking --> Sobering Up --> Illinois Basketball Dinner --> All Night Drinking --> Senior Day Basketball Game @ 9:30 am [Overall +4]

LaMike: +2 for Getting Tazed on Video, +1 for 7AM Zamboni Shift, -1 for Worst Day Drinker of Life Award, +1 for Cold Barrel Ubben Sniper of the Weekend (related to basketball playing, not literally shooting guns) [Overall +2]

Daisy: +2 for First Beer Ever [Overall +2]

Killa Kev: +3 for All-Time CCR Winner (loser?) Record Holder, +1 for Quoting "#holdmydiiiiick (5 i's)" All Weekend [Overall +4] 

Zemaster: +2 for Never Backing Down 21 Gamer of the Weekend, +2 for Making Woman Fall in Love with in 2 Day Window, +1 for Overquoting “CHIILLLL” [Overall +5]

Landy: -2 for Moving Girl Into Tony's Bed, +1 for Most Beer Consumed, -1 for Trying to Jump Through the Floor [Overall -2]

Rage F.: +2 for IHOP Play of the Year (Literally just taking us to IHOP) [Overall +2]

Drinks: -2 for Losing Keys, +1 for Most Hours of Sleep in one Day Winner, -1 for Freaking Out on Mario for Spraying Water on You When it Rained 5 Minutes Later [Overall -2]

J-Bird: +2 for Finding Drinks' Keys, +2 for Ho-Ssa Arm Chant Invention, +1 for Closet Sleeper, -1 for Drill Sergeant Yelling at TB & Killa [Overall +4]

Keggy Z: -2 for Being Unknown Assumed Puzzle Destroyer [Overall -2]

Senator S.: +2 for Being the ‘Yellowpages’ Know Everyone Player of the Weekend, -1 for Bringing his Girlfriend to hang out at 103.5 Chill [Overall +1]

TB.: -2 for Sleeping Pants Down, -2 for Peeing on Carpet, -2 for Having Craziest Color Throwup on Tony's Floor, +1 for Bringing New Sheets Over the Next Day [Overall -5]

CrazyMel: +2 for Creating 103.5 Chill on Facebook, -1 for Being Mexican on an Irish Holiday [Overall +1]

Folly: +1for Goldschlagger Pulls, +1 for Leaving Without Breaking the Other Table [Overall +2]

Stroobes: +1 for Being the Tazer Promoter/Originator [Overall +1]

Virginia: +1 Tidal Wave Survivor, +1 for Not Killing Someone Afterwords [Overall +2]

TomGina: +2 for Momma Van Caravan, -1 for Many PDA [Overall +1]

Heiny: -1 for Sleeping with eyes open at Geos, +2 for Hooking your Brother up with friends [Overall +1]

Peanut: +1 for White Owl Cigar Buyer of the Day, +1 for Green Street Cafe Customer of the Day, +1 for Tolerating our Wildness While GF was Here [Overall +3]

Mini: +2 for Club Can’t Handle Me Remix World Premiere [Overall +2]

The Aviator: +2 for the Mary Jane's Play of Thursday Night, -1 for Houdini Act/ Missing 103.5 Family Reunion Session [Overall +1]

Stevie: -2 for Turning Party into Rager By Inviting 25 Freshmen, +1 for Buying Food Sunday Night for Us [Overall -1]

Geese: -1 for Hooking up with a Freshman (nickname withheld) [Overall -1]

Door Bubble: +2 for Surviving the Weekend [Overall +2]

DeNunez: +1 for the Ketchup Bottle Fake Pee Spraying Everyone [Overall +1]

Thanks to JimmyJames for making this post possible, and be check out his sports blog at http://oneclapgametime.blogspot.com/. We'll be back in a few days.